Parents Blog

by Stephen

Top 6 Family and Kid Friendly Accommodations in South Africa

Our favorite kid and family friendly Budget Accommodations in South Africa

Our South Africa itinerary consisted of 11 stops:

Cape Town → Hermanus → Oudtshoorn → Wilderness → Plettenberg Bay → Jeffrey’s Bay → Addo Elephant Park → Chinsta → Coffee bay → St. Lucia → Durban

Hermanus

We stayed at the Hermanus Esplanade which was a good deal. At $55 US per night, we were given an entire fisherman’s cottage for our family.

We had a nice refrigerator, stove, family room and two bathrooms.

What we didn’t have was wi-fi or a swimming pool. Not biggies but the backpackers hostel may be worth the look and it seems to me it may be just a bit better for families.

Our kids had a special hideout upstairs as well which allowed them to sleep in and us parents to have a private room downstairs. The only downside is we are here in August and there is no heat whatsoever, it was quite cold in the evenings. We improvised by firing up the hot plate and using it as a radiant heater, which I must say didn’t work that badly – just don’t tell the owners.

Oudtshoorn

Karoo Soul – We stayed in the family “cottage” for US $60 per night. Nice and close to town, with a full kitchen and private bathroom.

This was a bit more than we wanted to spend for 3 nights but definitely comfortable and the staff was super friendly. On the plus side, we received discounts to activities probably worth about $20 on the first day alone.

Wilderness

Wilderness Beach House Backpackers – This place is so fun and friendly, the views are spectacular, it’s close to the beach and the owner of this lodge will make you feel right at home. It is cold in the winter and they don’t have heat, so be warned. You may want to ask for extra blankets.

Plettenberg Bay

Swallow’s Nest: We ended up at a B&B operated by a Dutch couple and their son. We talked them down to 700 Rand a night for a really nice 2 bedroom cottage overlooking the entire bay. They had a good internet connection a small pool (that was too cold for the kids unfortunately) and the best part… The most amazing breakfast I have ever had.

Honestly I would probably recommend the beachside backpackers just because their location is a bit better and it is probably a bit more budget-friendly for families but this breakfast was so good I may actually consider going back someday for that alone.

Jeffrey’s Bay

Stay at Cristal Cove

For around $65 a night we had our own family apartment complete with two bedrooms, two baths, balcony with a view to the ocean, full kitchen, living room, TV, consistent WiFi, beer bottle candles, a friendly cat, a lively bar downstairs, a pool table, tennis courts a block away, a playground a block away, great people to talk to and to round it off, Supertubes right outside our bedroom window

Addo Elephant Park

The Avoca river cabins are about 15 minutes away from the Elephant Park. Hands down this is the very best place we have stayed in all of south Africa (and that is saying a lot!).

Free kayaks for use on the river
Amazing river front cabins with a heater during the winter months!
A beautiful pool with a slide
A full kitchen
Two playgrounds each equipped with a ground level trampoline, zipline, tire swing and a jungle gym.
Less than $65 US per night!

Let me say it one more time as well to make sure you get this down. There is a free and amazing kid size zipline! So cool.

Breakfast was 5 dollars for adults and free for children, and because the property is on an orange orchard you can help yourself to all the oranges you would like. Because of this we ate oranges and drank freshly squeezed orange juice for 3 days straight!

by Stephen

Durban South Africa With Kids

Durban is an interesting stop in South Africa, my overall feeling is that it was a lot of fun, but finding our bearings was a bit complicated.

Lonely Planet describes Durban as the ultimate family playland, I am not sure I would go this far, but it can be a good place for families.

For little kids the biggest barrier to travel in Durban is the distance between attractions. Durban has a wonderful beachfront to stroll. But it is a long stroll that can be tiring for little legs, so just keep this in mind.

On Sunday it is party time and the main beachfront promenade is packed, you will see lots of families.

You can rent bikes and bicycle from one end to the next, you can rent skateboards, and body boards. They have a great skate park loaded with small children learning to roller skate and skateboard.

Things to do in Durban with Kids

Go to the Moses Mabhida Stadium

The Moses Mabhida Stadium at Durban Beachfront was the home to the 2010 World Cup Cup. It is beautiful and you can take a funicular up to the top with your entire family for about 15 dollars. Kids under 6 ride free and the view and the ride up will entertain kids and adults alike.

The entrance to the funicular is not obvious, so when you get there ask and somebody will point you in the right direction. You can rent bicycles and get a bite to eat all within the vicinity of the funicular entrance. They even offer very cheap Segway rides, your kids must be 12 and older.

On the front facing side is a playground that our kids enjoyed.

The Waterpark and Aquarium

Important – THE WATERPARK IS CLOSED MONDAY AND TUESDAY

This was a huge surprise. The tickets for the family for a combo ticket which included both the aquarium and the waterpark were very reasonable. We luckily were able to wait until Wednesday and we had an amazing day.

We started with a seal show (kind of lame but the kids liked it) followed by an amazing dolphin show and underwater aquarium.

From there we went across the way and spent the afternoon in the waterpark. Our 4 and 6 year olds were able to ride almost all the slides and they had a blast!

Rent a bicycle:

Bicycle hire is not only popular but a great way to get from one end to the other in a fun way. We rented two tandems for about $18 US for an hour. The kids whined a bit at first but ended up having a great time while mom and dad peddled them around upwind!

Go to the free waterpark slide on the waterfront:

This is a free waterpark with a big 2 sided waterslide that your kids will love. You can’t miss it when you are walking but if driving it is beachside from the ride park. Our kids made this a 2 day adventure and they had loads of good cheap fun!

Where to Stay in Durban With Kids

If you can, I would recommend skipping the hotel in Durban and stay instead at Umhlanga Rocks.

We ended up staying at the Three Cities Riverfront Hotel

Accommodations in Durban were frustrating and expensive. We ended up at a hotel, which although it was probably one of our more expensive stops was a letdown compared to our “self catering” accommodations in South Africa.

I wish I could be more help here. If you have kids, ideally you would stay on the Durban beachfront, but this is very pricey.

We spent one night on the Bluffs, which was too far off the beaten path and then up the road from the beachfront which was not ideal, but OK. Check the prices and try to find a beachfront property. Lonely Planet was little help and the backpackers hostels were not ideal for families.

What to eat in Durban

Eat some Bunny Chow, because this is where it was made famous. This is also a good place to get great tasting Indian food.

A note on surfing the Durban beachfront

The surf is kind of messy but could be fun. Surprisingly renting a surfboard in Durban is extremely difficult. After asking around, jogging and biking the entire beachfront I found one place to rent a board and it is a newer surf shop right next to the water-park and marine world. Why no one rents boards along the way is beyond me and it is a real shame.

The surf is tide dependent, which makes this challenging. Again, as a solo traveler my day depended on what I was feeling at any given moment. With kids, if the surf is up but if kids are going down, renting a board and getting out on the surf and back to your hotel room can be difficult. Especially if you are not right across from the beach, which in Durban will cost you the shirt off your back.

The beachfront from end to end is protected by a “shark repelling net”, at least that is what the surf shop told me. A grizzly old South African told me if you want to go surf with sharks surf Durban, according to the locals this was not true. I don’t know, seemed safe enough to me.

by Wendy 2 comments

Hluhluwe-iMolozi Park

View Google Map stay in St. Lucia

*Insiders tip: Hluhluwe-iMolozi is Malaria free and very well priced which makes it a better option than Kruger for families with small children (in my opinion).

Today we took our long-awaited safari ride through Hluhluwe-iMolozi Park

If you don’t want the locals to give you a funny face, this is pronounced Schlew Schlewi.

Although you can self drive the game park we chose Heritage Tours which was well worth the reasonable price (when compared to other options).

We stayed in the amazingly kid friendly St. Lucia at a reasonably priced self catering cottage called Stokkiesdraai. There may be more impressive places to stay in St. Lucia, but when you look at the cost, location and size of the units, it was really hard to beat.

The Hluhluwe-iMolozi Game Park Safari with Heritage Tours

Hluhluwe-iMolozi Park Heritage Tours with Kids

The morning started early and we got our times mixed up but we were headed off to the park by 6AM. Usually the safari starts out at 5 AM, it is a 1 hour ride to the park and this allows for the best viewing of the large cats: Tigers and Leopards.

We were the only ones on the safari drive which was wonderful because the kids could have full range of the tall truck and their attention span was able to be catered to as well as their stomachs and bathroom rights.

We were lucky because our guide John said they are busy year round going out everyday. It just so happens the first two weeks of September is the low time for St Lucia.

We didn’t see any cats, not sure if this is because we lost that 1st hour in the morning or as John said sometimes as a cold front moves in the cats tend to not show up; just something he has noticed.

We did see their paw prints though as well as plenty of giraffe, white rhinos, wart hogs, impalas, Kudu, Zebras, hawks, bumble bee eating bird, Eland (type of antelope; not related to deer), one elderly buffalo lying on the bank of the river and our last great encounter was three large male Elephants.

We and another truck had the pleasure of watching them pass through us as they walked down to the river bed. Each on looked directly at us and flared their giant ears to show us who was boss.

The elephants at this park as to opposed to Addo Elephant Park are known to be much more aggressive so we kept our distance. WildCrats (a popular American animal show for kids) came in handy again and the kids were able to tell us all about the symbiotic relationship with the birds ( that sat on the backs of all the animals.

The White Rhino

Hluhluwe-iMfolozi Park is most famous for their conservation efforts to bring back the black and white rhinos.

Every year thousands are poached for their large horn which can be worth well over $900,000 US. John said if nothing was done about the demand for the horns themselves that they could go extinct in less than 20 years.

We had the honor of seeing these animals up close and they are so ancient looking and really defenseless against poachers. They have very poor eyesight and this makes it easy for poachers to sneak up on them when the wind is just right. The rangers are almost helpless in stopping this from happening. They are unable to cover such a vast area of the parks and even if they do come upon them they are unable to fire unless fired upon. John says they are becoming even more brazen and will come in during the day.

Choosing a Safari that is Good For Kids

We opted for the half day safari option which cost $278 for 2 adults and 2 children.

The half day safari was plenty. The seating consisted of padded bench seats in the back of a pick-up designed to have upper viewing and the hood of the truck was cut out so our driver could communicate with us easily. He was so knowledgeable and the roads are so laden with pot holes, and dirt roads, not to mention poor signage in the park.

Well worth the money to not go through the park in your own vehicle.

Enjoying the sun roof

Kids are happy

Elephants of Hluhluwe-iMolozi

A different tour company

Park entrance

Enjoying the ride

Giraffes in Hluhluwe-iMolozi

Hluhluwe-iMolozi after the controlled burn

If you’re debating between going to a private game reserve or visiting one of the smaller private game parks, you’ll have to weigh your options.

If you want a guaranteed chance of seeing all of the big five, a private game park such as Schotia Safari’s near The Addo Elephant Park will be your best bet.

If you want to see how the animals truly interact in a large ecosystem which is much less “touristy” then visit one of the larger game parks and take a multi-day walking safari. Keep in mind, this is not an option with small kids below the age of 12.

If you do choose to see the big five in a private game reserve, my feeling now is don’t feel like this is unnatural. All of South Africa’s big five are fenced in. There is no such thing as a true African wildlife safari that we may have dreamed of as little children. Humans have now overtaking their environment, yes, all of it.

The landscape was all control burned. They do this every year in the spring before the summer rains. This mimics the natural occurring fires. The fire takes down all the brown vegetation and allows the green new vegetation/grasses to sprout again. Only the green grasses provide enough protein for the animals.

Before the park was formed, naturally the animals would roam from one area to the next seeking out these green grasses. They are now in a 7 year drought and all the rivers are very low.

by Stephen

Visa Problems in Bali

This is what happens when you don't pay close attention to Indonesian visa laws.

Looking out from the inside of the Balinese jail cell it all became clear. I should have never quit my day job!

Then I woke up and realized it was all just a bad dream.

We did, however, in the span of 24 hours:

fail to complete our Indonesian Visa extension in time
we lost our pre-booked campervan rental in New Zealand without our knowledge
we lost our bank card in the ATM machine and
we did have to pony up over $750 in cash to avoid deportation.

But at least we aren’t in jail… Yet!

Later the next day, while on our drive to Kuta to catch our newly adjusted flight, I caught myself lamenting our unfortunate chain of events to Dewa, our wonderful Balinese van driver.

In response, he simply said:

“sometimes you have to pay good money to learn from your mistakes“.

Yes indeed, I love Hinduism!

What is a good price for a roadschool education?

After Dewa proved he was far along the path of a good Karmic reincarnation, I began thinking back to all my years of paid education.

I bet if you added it all up (minus loans, grants and free government money) my undergraduate and graduate degrees with interest and cost of living would total well over $300,000 dollars.

Hell, my Cecil’s Textbook of Medicine which now doubles as a table weight for home construction projects was close to $200 alone.

So this time, when we were faced with a very costly error in judgment, it was good to step back and put everything into perspective.

The school of the world will make you pay from time to time for the privilege of enrollment.

Mistakes make your brain grow

My daughter’s kindergarten teacher has a wonderful saying “mistakes are what makes your brain grow“. My daughter will remind me of this from time to time, and it is true.

No matter how carefully you plan, prepare, analyze or set up detailed parameters to prevent an epic fail, things will fall through the cracks.

This time, when I was forking over the money to Indie to adjust our flights and prevent hard jail-time in Bali I was kicking myself. “Man, what I could have done with that money I thought, we just threw it all away. ”

But, it was an education and if you compare its cost with a college textbook or one semester at community college (or the price of fixing a leaking hot water heater) the school of hard knocks is actually very cheap.

Roadschooling for Parents and Travelers

When most traveling families talk about roadschooling we are usually referring to our kids’ education. But we parents are receiving an education just as valuable.

What can a $600 dollar mistake teach you that is of any benefit?

Great question, I can tell you one thing, next time I book my airline tickets I will make sure to carefully read through each countries visa requirements and review them once again with immigration upon arrival at the airport.

It also teaches one to be a traveler not a tourist.

Becoming a world-class traveler requires an education. Becoming a world-class tourist is usually free of charge.

Tourists pay other people for the privilege of avoiding mistakes, travelers pay as they go.

Travelers become tour guides, tourists may avoid the stress, the problems, the long lines and the extra costs of a roadschooling education. But really, what do we worry about more when we travel?

That something will happen, or that nothing will?

And which one is more valuable in the long run?

by Stephen

Hiring a Babysitter in Bali – Parents can Now Eat, Pray and Love

Our 4 year old son having fun with the babysitter.

Several year ago I listened to Elizabeth Gilbert’s now famous book Eat, Pray Love.

At the time I am not sure that I knew such a large portion of this book was written about Ubud Bali, our next stop, but I remember Elizabeth finding her spiritual center on an exotic island, and yes, I guess it really was Bali.

As a single white female traveling alone through Bali to discover yourself and find love, it may be easy to find time to relax. But can you do this as a parent?

Finding a Babysitter in Bali

On the travel circuit you meet all types. When it comes to families and Bali, the majority have been Aussies taking 1-2 week holidays to unwind.

The Aussies and New Zealander’s seem to know how to do Bali right, so we took notes.

Leaving your children in a foreign country with a babysitter who 90% of the time doesn’t speak a lick of English can be a frightening thought. But, after watching the Aussie parents relax to morning Yoga, get a massage, take day trips and generally unwind all while their children were being thoroughly entertained by a kind, smiling Balinese teenager… It was just too much to resist.

So, we decided to take the leap.

The typical cost of a babysitter in Bali is about $3-4 US per hour, this was for 2 children

To find a babysitter it is easy, simply ask someone at the front desk of where you are staying, or really any other Balinese person you come across. If somebody asks you if you need a taxi, you can say no, but I need a babysitter and I am sure they will be happy to oblige.

Many of the Aussies would set this up for the entire week. For example, taking yoga every morning and scheduling a babysitter to come in for 2 -3 hours daily for the week. You can do this for a day, a month, a week or probably the year 🙂

The babysitters smile and let your children really do whatever they want. The kids couldn’t be happier. What is amazing is that when you give kids the reins, remind them to be careful and respectful, things work out surprisingly well.

We took a 6 hour snorkeling trip, and the kids had a great day, we gave the hotel our cell phone number and made sure the babysitter could swim if they were to go in the water. Otherwise no pool time. When we got back they were happy as larks, and so were we.

My only regret about the babysitting in Bali is that we didn’t use it more.

You do not need to stay in fancy hotels to get a babysitter. Babysitters are ubiquitous and everybody in Bali is trustworthy and kind. You can feel very confident taking longer day trips and know that your kids will be well entertained. You can worry about something bad happening, but it is a waste of time, kids will be kids whether they are with you or the babysitter and actually they are probably safer with the babysitter.

For parents it can be a well deserved break, that is very inexpensive and probably under-utilized.

by Stephen

When Bad Things Happen

Today on a 3-hour drive from Pemuteran down to Ubud we watched as a 12-year-old boy lost control of his motorbike and crashed landing just yards away directly in front of our van.

He was sideswiped by an oncoming driver and then a truck ran over his body after he landed on the asphalt.

I was sitting in the front passenger’s seat reading and looked up just in time to see most of it, including the rag doll effect of his body rebounding upward as the truck ran him over then released the full weight of the vehicle from his torso.

It happened so fast, so extremely fast.

What transpired next surprised me even more. Our driver sat there and said “you saw nothing, we saw nothing.”

I was horrified.

The Bystander Effect

There was probably 12 or 15 adults standing around the scene of the accident, everyone stood around and looked on as this young child bled to death in the middle of the road.

I told our driver I was getting out of the car.

I walked up to the boy and saw quite a bit of blood, his legs and arms were twitching, as I leaned down to asses the situation two other men came to help. There was an audible silence, and a lot of people speaking in Balinese, I could tell they were pointing fingers.

I stabilized his head and neck the best I could and we lifted him up, he was bleeding from his forehead. He was barely conscious and unable to speak, his eyes were rolling up into the heavens and his pupils appeared dilated.

The three of us took him to the side of the road where I wanted to place him down on the soft grass so we could quickly address any injuries that may need to be stabilized.

The owner of the home yelled at us and pushed us off her lawn, I was taken aback, yet not really surprised. I could tell by our drivers reaction that this was a unique and culturally sensitive situation.

We had to carry the boy past two unwelcoming storefronts until we finally settled for a broken stone walkway on the roadside. I checked his breathing and pulse which was strong and then unbuttoned his shirt and shorts. There were no obvious signs of an external injury. One of the men pulled off his helmet and that is when I got a good look at the boy. It is also when I realized that indeed, he was just a boy.

He could have been my boy, anybody’s boy.

The two men who had helped were also driving a truck with some type of flower or produce in the back. The plan was to drive him quickly to the hospital. We lifted the boy once again and they sat him in the front middle seat of the truck. His body went limp and he fell against the passenger side window.

Then they drove quickly away.

It all happened so fast

It wasn’t until the truck was leaving that I felt the heavy burden of dread come over me, when I realized I should have jumped in the bed of that truck and gone with them.

My family was in a van pulled off the side of the road up ahead, but our driver would have followed had I demanded it.

How could I be so stupid to let him go? What if he started to crash, needed CPR or just somebody there to hold him and care for him on that one hour ride?

Where was I going that was all that important?

So I sat back down in the leather seat of our 6 passenger van and I thought about this 12-year-old boy.

How his life had begun this morning and may have ended this afternoon. He was simply coming home from school, riding a scooter, the warm breeze his hair, laughing like a schoolboy should and then….

It happened so fast!

by Stephen 2 comments

Jimbaran Bali is Great for Kids

(Google map link)

Jimbaran was an incidental stop on our 1 month trip to Bali.

We ended up spending 3 nights here after a 5 pm arrival at Bali International airport in need of a place to catch up on sleep.

The saving grace for Jimbaran was the Hotel Puri Bambu – which after coming from the cold winter of South Africa was a welcome respite. We all immediately jumped into the huge central swimming pool and my first thought was “I am in heaven.”

Then I ordered a cold beer from the poolside bar!

We found Jimbaran on a last minute ( the night before) internet search on where to stay around Kuta (which wasn’t Kuta) when arriving Ngurah Rai International Airport. Several sites recommended Jimbaran with kids because it had a nice beach, gentle surf, and a relaxed atmosphere.

As you will find with many places in Bali, especially when traveling with kids, the hotel can be a highlight of a certain location and can make or break a place. Coming from South Africa where we had large and inexpensive “self-catering units” we realized very quickly that if we were not all going to share a bed we would have to pay a bit more.

Hotel Puri Bambu has one of the nicest pools we have come across for a very reasonable price, lovely gardens and a good Bali feel.

Jimbaran beach is actually quite nice. If you are arriving here as your first stop in Bali as we were you may be under-impressed, but as you travel the island you will begin to see why people say it is a good place for kids.

Surfing in Jimbaran Beach is Perfect for Kids and Beginners

There is a very gentle surf break at the far end (opposite the airport side) where anyone could learn to surf, when the tide is right it is perfect for body surfing and our kids had a blast playing in the waves. It is one of the only beaches in Bali we have been to that had fun waves and very little riptide.

Kuta’s main beach is fun for kids as well, but the rips here are strong as you will see when you visit.

Jimbaran is famous for its beachside seafood dining. We did partake in one sunset meal and it was nice, but it all felt a bit fake and a little forced. But like the guidebooks said, you can sit and enjoy a meal while your kid’s frolick on the beach… That, of course, is only if they are in the mood.

The walk from Hotel Puri Bambu is about 5-7 minutes to the beach and your kids probably will complain if this is your first stop and they are adjusting to the beach. It makes a great starting point for a trip to Uluwatu Temple as well for a night dance, although we did not know this until we had already left and were in Kuta.

Final Verdict

Jimbaran is not a “must see” Bali location by any means. It is made very nice by the well priced and well located Hotel Puri Bambu which really sells it in my mind as an airport stopping point. The breakfast is one of the best we have had and they have a free shuttle into Kuta which I have yet to see anywhere else on our adventures.

The beach is decent, not AMAZING, and you can eat fish on the beach, but you can really do this anywhere.

Costs and highlights:

Transfer from airport to hotel (by the hotel) was 75,000 IDR (about 7 bucks)
Hotel Puri Bambu – about $55 US per night plus an extra bed if you want for $20 – this is the one place we paid the difference which brought up the cost.
Free amazing breakfast.
Free WiFi that was pretty good.

by Stephen

Balian Beach and Pondok Pitaya: Bali Indonesia

After 1 week in Bali our family was craving an ideal location for surf and fun with the kids. We happened upon Balian Beach after changing plans to avoid the overpriced Gilis.

Here is What we Wanted

Great beginner/intermediate surfing right outside our door (check)
Surfboards to hire/rent (check)
A nice pool for the kids (check)
very close to the beach (check)
A spacious room (big check)

We found it all (and more) at Pondok Pitaya on Balian beach.

Although the surf was a bit bigger than I would have liked while were there, everything about Balian beach and Pondok Pitaya was perfect.

They had babysitting, yoga, message, wonderful surfing, surfing lessons, board rentals, good food, a great atmosphere and lots of vacationing families.

We stayed there for 5 days and 6 nights

Front porch

Balian Beach

Our “room”

Making Australian Friends

The afternoon wind could be strong, but the morning and early evenings were perfect. The surf favors a 5-6 food swell with a mid to high tide. It can go from perfect to quite big overnight and is a bit fickle. There are strong rips and a rocky bottom so it is not great for surfing with small children.

The cost of a driver to Balian Beach from the East Coast of Sanur was 400,000 Indonesian Rupiah… About $35 US.

Surfboard rentals are right next to the hotel and should be no more than 50,000. There were boards of all sizes in mediocre condition for rent.

You can get lessons from a great instructor for about $35 US.

The message and yoga options are large and varied, on-site they are more expensive than you will find in the bigger cities.

The accommodations are unique and very, I call them super bungalows.

You are right on the beach and you can see the surf from your bed.

Tide shifts are huge and there is a very strong rip so again be forewarned.

Prices on Bookings.com tend to be the best. Pondok Pitaya on Bookings.

You may also want to double check on Agoda to find the best price. Pondok Pitaya on Agoda

by Stephen

Tonight, everything seems just right!

Morning sun over the Balian Beach Rice Fields

I ran today for the first time in 10 days.

My God I thought, life is beautiful.

The sun rising warmly over the rice terraces, casting a golden yellow glow as sweet as honey upon the rusted cast iron fence and hand carved stone edifice of the Hindu Temple.

Into the Mangrove forest, along a deserted stone pathway, crossing cattle, coconut lined dirt roads, and palm trees… So many long, tall, fluffy palm tress.

Then up the hill, past a waterfall.

Hidden treasures I call them, and I pack them away into my “bag.”

I save them for a later time when a day is long or hard or life seems a little too monotonous.

Covers off, parting the lipstick red mosquito nets that drape my bamboo bed, my footsteps are silenced by the sound of waves beating the black sand beaches of Balian bay.

And the children sleep, lulled by the cool air, the ocean and the humm of the room fan perched besides their beds.

Today, we had a great day.

We bid farewell to small friends with Australian accents, little brown nosed dogs and a broomstick prince.

I took one last swim, returned the rental surfboard and greeted the warm toothless smile of the old, wrinkled Balinese women who took my $20 dollars for the 5 day board rental.

One final eggs on toast with homemade apple jam, fresh fruit and background music which reminded me I am indeed middle age.

This is living, this is what it means to breath I think, and now I type, sipping lightly sweetened, packaged Nescafe, my distorted reflection on the shiny silver tea pot and the warm Balinese air.

Tonight, everything seems just right!

In front of our cabin

by Stephen 4 comments

Helping Children (and Ourselves) Adjust to a new Family Travel Lifestyle

I am not a psychiatrist or an expert on parenting, if I was maybe I wouldn’t be writing this post.

Hell, if I was I probably wouldn’t have quit my job and bought tickets halfway around the world.

But, I have been traveling 6 weeks now with my wife and 2 small children taking on roadschooling, sharing often small rooms and small beds in confined places and traveling through some difficult to negotiate places.

I have been learning to manage a fledgling online business with spotty internet and very limited connections.

Almost every day I bookmark something that I will turn to as a highlight in my book of life. Everyday our learning and life experience grows exponentially.

My children have been asked to break out of every comfortable routine they have ever had, my wife and I have had to learn to work as a strong and unified team, we have all had to learn to work together.

Rooming together has had its ups and downs. It has led to some real memorable bedtime talks as a family that I will never forget, also it has led to children rolling off beds, legs on our heads, long periods of involuntary abstinence and difficult evenings when everybody is tired (most notably the two times after we had 23 hour flights!)

Many parenting books talk about giving children space to vent and cool off if they are overtired and are throwing a fit. This is not so hard when you are in the comfort of your home, in a hotel at 11pm when everyone is sleeping or in a long line after 2 hours of sitting in customs this can be very challenging.

I wrote both my parents the other day describing some of the difficulties we have experienced over the last two weeks:

Our six year olds resistance to homeschooling.
Some truly epic meltdowns when everyone is overtired, hungry or thirsty.
Homesickness

There were several times in the past 2 weeks that I was ready to throw in the proverbial towel and just book a flight home already. Family travel is great when everyone is happy, but when people are overtired, overheated and in search of a good meal things can go sour pretty fast.

My mom, a schoolteacher of 30 years, who raised my sister and I, is the epitome of zen in the face of a childhood meltdown.

She had this to say:

I really found this to be true in dealing with children. They don’t know what is wrong or have the skills to cope so they act out. Many adults have the same lack of skills!

She hit the nail on the head on this one!

Sometimes in the middle of a truly wonderful day one of our children will act out over what seems to be the tiniest things.

This has been amplified over the last 2 weeks.

It can present as rudeness, a lack of empathy, bickering, complaining etc. etc.

I believe it all has a common core, one that requires we as parents to react with love, empathy and a calm demeanor.

Beyond the culture, beyond the animals, beyond the unique smells, new foods and amazing people there is something else that can grow out of family travel.

A strong family:

One that treats each other and everyone around them with respect
A family that reacts with kindness and love in all situations
A family that has a desire to understand and identify with the struggles of others
A family that respects one another
That embraces lifelong learning

These things, which I thought were simple and obvious become more difficult when we are stressed.

Travel does create stress, which can lead to cracks in your armor. It has exposed many of my own, and I believe at the end of the year it will be this mission, this goal to become a stronger more loving and generous family that will be our greatest reward as well as our greatest challenge!

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